Saturday, April 12

The Art of a Good Marriage

The Art Of A Good Marriage

Wilfred Arlan Peterson

Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens.
A good marriage must be created.
In marriage the little things are the big things.
It is never being too old to hold hands.
It is remembering to say "I love you" at least once a day.
It is never going to sleep angry.
It is at no time taking the other for granted;
the courtship should not end
with the honeymoon, it should continue through the years.
It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives.
It is standing together facing the world.
It is forming a circle of love that gathers the whole family.
It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice,
but in the spirit of joy. It is speaking words of appreciation
and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.
It is not looking for perfection in each other.
It is cultivating flexibility, patience,
understanding and a sense of humour.
It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.
It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow old.
It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.
It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal,
dependence is mutual and the obligation is reciprocal.
It is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.

Tonight I am posting this poem for my sister who's getting married on the 19th and my brother whose marriage is undergoing a rough ride lately. I am now somehow stuck in the middle of being happy and sad. I think this is what being in limbo is all about. Hmm... life can play a real cruel joke.

We are all excited in the union that is to be solemnized next week. My sister and her fiance will already celebrated their 11th anniversary as BF/GF last June 2007. It is really about time that they say their "I Do's". We are all busy with the preparations. Being the Matron of Honor, I am in-charge of almost everything. We're down to our last five days and I still need to get the misalette printed and bound, the souvenirs bought tomorrow , Mama's gown, Papa's pants, and Dadijun's and Rap's Barong Tagalog bought on Monday, the Reception Repertoire uploaded on my Ipod (we will just hook the Ipod to the sound system), and the flowers bought at Dangwa on Friday night. Toxic but still exciting.

On the other hand...

The last week had been a hell of a rollercoaster ride of emotions for me. I felt the hurt in my brother's heart seeing that his marriage is on the rocks. I am now helping them in a way that I know is best, that is, letting them heal their wounds on their own. I pray that the time that they are now spending apart from each other will help them realize the value of the marriage that they are throwing away.

I hope that not only my sister and my brother get the most out of reading this poem, but all the married couples who read this.

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